End of Suppositions
(An Un-Valentine’s Day Poem)
By Leslie Williams
In case you were wondering how I’m doing…
Drowning in this pool of hopelessness
and misery
(On Valentine’s Day, no
less)
Causes me to dwell on what
once was.
Those nebulous and insecure
feelings I had for you,
All those times that you
made me question myself
Because of your irresolute
yes’s and no’s…
Do I love her or do I not…
Because of your obvious avarice
for
My heart, my time, my love,
my…ALL
To completely consume me
Without allowing me to have
a
Piece of you…
For that, I do not forgive
you.
Each day, I have tried to recapitulate
our relationship
Into a few pathetic lines of
verse
Only to find that there was
too
Much to us to summarize
Especially on such an
Empty page.
Yes, you were cunning.
Yes, you were astute
In your feigned conveyance
of love for me.
Your tendency to equivocate
your statements,
Leading me to decide for
myself whether you
Loved me or not,
Must
Be
Forgotten.
I have no desire to resuscitate
my relationship
With you
Even if I am hurting
Within.
Not just my heart but my
pride.
I built you up to be more
Than you ever could be
By giving you ceaseless adulations
Always overlooking your slovenly
ways
That drove me crazy.
Now, I realize that your
heart
(if you want to call it
that)
Is a landfill of penury,
where
You are not capable of
loving anyone…
Well, at least not me.
My emptiness will soon abate…
according to what “they” say.
But the honest anathema that
this
No longer novice lover has
will not soon
Disappear.
No, it is no evanescent
thing where I will
One day look at you with
longing.
My egregious pity for you
will be quite obvious
Though I long for these dilatory
feelings
To make themselves known
now.
Please, right now…
Do I find you culpable for
my pain?
Do I want you to suffer as I
have?
To say that I want you to
Feel what I feel
See what I see
Would be a pretentious
answer
To your unasked question.
I want you to feel worse
For the obviousway
That you cast me aside.
Perhaps if you had known me
better,
You would have realized that
my
Resentment
Lies dormant, hidden, torpid…
Waiting to be awakened by
one
Who dares to trample on my
And they lived happily ever
after heart…
**Side note: this poem was written as a vocabulary test for my students using one of the units from the Vocabulary Workshop Level F. The vocabulary words were left out, and they had to fill in the blanks based on the context clues. They could work together, but they were still frustrated.
